Hi, empathy and giving advice are to different things. And are frequently confused by people who are trying to help and have good intentions.

Empathy=> is saying something like "wow I can hear that you are really angry right now, is there anything I can do to help?"

advice => you SHOULD do this..or that. Or not do that ather thing....

There is always a temptation to FIX something. When my husband starts giving me "advice" when I'm stressed out it sends me into orbit. It's stresses me out more because now I'm not doing what he thinks I should do on top of the original stress.

I'm not trying to say that this is you fault. I'm saying that you need to take care of you first, and your own daughter.. Stop giving her advice. Tell her directly that you feel like she's taking out her anger on you. When the 2 of you are in a calm space...telling her when you 2 are in the middle of an argument might not work so well.

Ask her what she wants or needs instead of telling her what she should do. She may just need a hug, or she may not know. It will save you the additional frustration of unheeded advice.

Good luck to you and hope things get easier