Hi rosed71. I am so sorry you have lost your trust in the children you raised and put so much energy into their lives. That is what parents do. It is a treasure when they recognize the gift and thank you with gratitude but that does not always happen.

About the "but I am afraid of them. I actually fear them now and don't want to be alone with them without a neutral safe person in a safe place because of my life experience with the feeling that a person will try to hurt me and my life." What do you think about exploring that with a therapist or psychiatrist to find out what you may about this feeling and what can be done to help you find peace with the situation?