Hey seeminglyreal
I also didn't find a solution yet. Although it is kind of a relief that I am not the only one who feels this way, it still does not change the situation and the way I'm feeling.
Do you know if you have any mental health concerns that would explain this personality/identity issue?
Regarding myself, I do not know about anything, as I have not been evaluated by a professional.
But do you also feel like you kind of knew how to be yourself when you where younger? With me it's like I didn't have these issues 7 years ago.
Also, recently, I kind of fail at everything I attempt to do. Even at things that I have been very good at all my life. This makes me feel even more like I don't know how to be myself anymore.
I wish I could get back to my younger self which apparently knew better who she was than me now.
I wish I could give you an advice but I am clueless for my part, too.
And I wish I could tell you not to hate yourself. But what can I say? I hate myself too after all and I know that it doesn't help if someone tells you not to.
But what I CAN say is that the main reason I hate myself is that I am such a failure right now in everything I attempt. Not so much because I don't know how to be myself. You're not doing any harm to somebody by not knowing how to be yourself.
You may be an inconsistent person. But you're not a bad person.