I will simply say this. No CHILD know how to properly cope with abuse, and it shouldn't be expected. In the case of severe it simply isn't as easy as picking oneself up by their bootstraps. Then again, your talking about some who developed full on alcoholism by age 12. This means A) his brain development was changed. B) he developed alcoholism at young age. Does this me he shouldn't be proactive and get some help? No, but the alcoholism throws an extra layer. While many people argue that addiction isn't a disease. All of the research show that alcoholism is genetic, rather highly genetic actually. He may have started drinking to cope, but this isn't going to stop on it's own, at this point. If anything by now, he should be in a residential dual diagnosis program. It may sound like an excuse to you, but perhaps he just very aware of why he started drinking in the first place.