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Originally Posted by stopchewinggum
I also didn't say that you did. That's not where I was going with that.
Okay, so let be clear. The average Joe on the street who blames their parents b/c they wouldn't let them play sports whatever is an idiot. The average Joe on the street also hasn't experienced intense child abuse. This why your posts can be confusing. I, also, think for many of us who have experienced actual child abuse, and not just parents who were hard to live with, can sometimes forget just hard our lives have been. Yes, some people are more resilient than others. There are many factors that contribute to this. Some of these are things like personality and IQ or whether or not a mental illness is present. Also, everyone has their own path to recovery. At the end of the day, you cannot help someone who isn't ready or doesn't want, for whatever reason, to put in the work themselves. Have a nice day.
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Ok,fair enough,I should have said 'any random joe' rather than 'average joe', my mistake on that one.I'm not talking about blaming parents for trivial things.I experienced extreme abuse,both physical and sexual throughout my entire childhood.My brother was mostly a witness to all of the abuse.There was a huge difference in what we experienced and there's also a huge difference in how we deal with it now as adults.My interest was in what causes those differences in not just myself and my brother but also with anyone that has experienced abuse.
I do agree that someone cannot be helped if they're not ready or not willing to put in the work.
I guess it's as simple as that.