I'm so glad and I hope you can find some help with Inquiry and journaling. I felt very similar to how you feel for a really long time. Life just felt really hard and there didn't seem to be any joy in it. I was just very nervous and self conscious and so lonely all the time. And now that I feel better I just want to help other people feel better too. It's so easy once you figure it out.

I spent years feeling like life was worthless, and this morning I went for a walk and just the sun shining on some weeds along the path, I just felt like overwhelmingly lucky to be a part of such an incredible world.

Like I know that you are having a hard time now and it's hard to imagine life feeling good, or imagine yourself feeling powerful or peaceful or radiant or magical. But from my position here where I have let depression go, I can tell you that you are perfect and precious and incredibly powerful. And you can change your brain chemistry and your world just by changing your thinking.

Just start doing it. The time will pass anyway. Why not just see what happens?