Hello all I just wanna vent for a moment and maybe ask a question or two. First, I always feel I should be happier then what I am, I seem to either feel I shouldn't feel as good as I am because I'm "bipolar" and others are suffering worst then me so I always feel like it's extremely hard to be happy or accept that maybe my bipolar isn't as bad as someone else's and thus for I "should " be happy but I'm not. It's so hard for me to pinpoint the core of this issue. I don't know if it's because medication that alters my mood or is this just the way I am and if I wasn't bipolar I'd feel the same way in my life currently? I do however feel noticeably less depressed ever since I got my job. Just started Monday. I do find myself getting stressed tho, but this is normal and apart of being an adult with a full time job. But I am working with clients with traumatic brain injuries and they have it significantly harder then I do, and for some reason this depresses me because I feel like I am ungrateful for not being happy. It's like I constantly ask myself why am I so unhappy when other people have it so much harder then me. Idk I'm just venting cause I have nowhere else to vent too, but is anyone happy while on medication? I feel like I blame all my problems on medication but it's really hard to dictate what's med related and what's "normal" and I won't go off my lithium cause I'd rather feel like this then risk having another manic episode. My last one almost destroyed my life and I just don't wanna take a risk of that happening again. Also it's really hard to lose weight while being on these meds and my weight contributes to my unhappiness. I'm not terribly big 243ish 6'1 but I used to be in great shape before meds and they caused all my weight gain... Again sorry for the rant just needed to vent respond if you have any input thanks!