It's almost as depressing as the depression; making an appointment at my local surgery to ask for mental health issues help.

The fact that I have joined this forum means I'm probably desperate (no offence to anyone, you all seem really nice).

Sigh.

Due to my long work hours, an appointment has to coincide with my day off from work... which means it could be weeks... The other option is to turn up to an 'emergency' early morning surgery, where you're likely to be refused if the other patients are more urgent...

Deep breath.

I know what's waiting because I've done it before. A harassed GP, with ten minutes to spare. A waiting list for therapy which they say will be three months but is always - I'm going on friends' experiences as well as my own - a year.

The last time I tried, I asked for medication and was flat-out refused (my mother had died and the GP decided my reaction was 'normal').

So, no meds and no therapy for a year. Oh, great, thank you very much. I'll go and live in a cave for a year, shall I?

I paid for private therapy last time, which was successful but costs £40 an hour, so I could only afford a short course.

Sorry for the rant. I know I need help, but it's so exhausting. One friend applied to a charity, but the hoops she had to jump through were incredible, and it still took about eight months for a short course.

I need a happy period in my life in order to have the strength to ask for help?

It would be funny if I didn't feel so desperate...