I'm still thinking of what you said, especially about how I have been talking about assertiveness a lot and I agree, it is time to start sticking up for my own rights. It occurred to me this morning at church that I might have more "luck" speaking with HIM than her. Yes, she is pushy. However, he is a pastor, trained in diplomacy and caring and all those good qualities that they learn in their various places of education. HE SHOULD BE ABLE TO COMPROMISE. She is always concerned for his health and hers, because she is homebound and has many physical ailments. So she was probably just thinking of his comfort and his physical being. HE on the other hand would be far more aware of my mental and spiritual needs (and my BF's). So when HE calls me to arrange meeting me, I am going to politely suggest that we meet, not at my place, but at his motel. I am hoping that he will see the "light" and agree! WISH ME LUCK!!! This will be one of the first times in my life that I stand up for my rights!!!