I have a severe OCD & BP...

Forgive me for saying this first because of my bad experience with another forum not related to this site...

I humbly ask all of you not to take sides such as my side or the other whom I may include in the current & future posts. Please balance out both sides.

Thanks

Now back to my topic...

1 example of this could be that...
Since my husband and I share 1 car...
He is a full time student. He have classes in the afternoon-night. His college is close to our home...
I am a full time worker. I work far from home because that is the only job with good pay for those with deafness like me...
Since I start around noon... that means that my husband has to leave home early to drop me off at work.
My husband is definitely not a morning person...
I used to be late frequently because of this issue...
But this whole situation had a sudden and huge change... well, because I started to pressurize my husband to get up & get ready to leave... such as shaking him hard, throwing any objects, water, etc.. on him, slap or hit him if he goes back to sleep... I also offer him coffee but it takes pretty slow processing for him to wake up fully...
As a result of this... I started to come to job on time stably...
I feel like the burden of this... having to wake my husband up daily for my work is starting to "take over my life"
I always feel panic coming on to me each morning
My husband says "See, things have changed for the good & could I take easy on him, not be too rough"
I was like, true but my behavior seems to remain the same.
I feel like I am on thin ice every morning, always panicking but in the end, I get to work on time.
I also stress over this...