I'm not valuable though, that's the problem
The sad fact is that very few people outside my immediate family would even notice if I wasn't here any more, and they wouldn't even care
As for meds, this is the problem I have with my pdoc - she keeps wanting me to try new meds, as she is sure something will work eventually, and I feel really ungrateful and selfish for disagreeing because of the effect that the continuous cycle of trying something new, weaning off it and then trying something new again is having on me.
I am not averse to medication, I have a pharmacology degree, PhD and worked for a pharmaceutical company for many years - so I know how the drugs work, and I know the problems with them but I also know that you cab't just keep throwing different drugs at a problem and hoping that one of them will work...