I've been physically ill for a long time and lost hope of getting better somewhere along the line.. I think I was just tired of trying anything new as I felt I'd tried EVERYTHING and nothing helped.

However, after taking a break, I'm trying new things now and feel something's changed.. I'm actually getting help for my problems! I think all the self-reflection I do has made me more aware of what it is exactly that I need, and also fed up of other people thinking they know better - meaning I'm able to say no when they try to offer me something that doesn't feel right. I can draw my own boundaries now!

I can hardly believe that I can start to give up this hopelessness I've felt for as long as I can remember.. I used to think 'It won't work anyway.. Whatever.. I don't care. It's all for nothing.' But now I realize maybe all I needed was to rest.. Not give up. Because how would that work! I'm not going to kill myself - don't even want to.. So what - I'd spend the rest of my life making myself depressed, not caring about anything? No.. I'm going to keep trying things until I find the ways that'll help me feel better