i really am. i dont know what to write in the letters i used to write to him for almost every session... and i definitely dont know what to say in my session tomorrow. Can it really be tomorrow?

when i try to think my mind goes blank. If i push harder i get anxious or fall asleep. i forget what gets said in session too.

i am really missing him and i am wanting to see him tomorrow, but i am afraid too. So withdrawn. i dont want to be all Mz misery you know? i dont feel like i have a starting point..or even a middle point.. no point at all.

what can he do anyway? i mean, with the current life crisis that is ongoing (and going and going) we have rehashed it to death. What else is there? Nothing he can do and i can't seem to do anything either. Stand still.

i feel bad. Instead of being all happy to be back i feel kinda like it's pointless to go. SOmetimes i feel bad for him.