I have issues with putting myself first. I'm constantly hyperaware of other people's feelings and frustrations, and putting myself first at the expense of someone else leaves me wracked with soul-sucking guilt.

So, at the moment, I'm about to leave my job. I won't get into it here, because I just had a whoooole long forum about why I'm needing to leave, etc, and a lot of great people helped me make that decision! �� The decision is made, I'm applying for other jobs, I'm going.

But the GUILT. Ahhhh the guilt! I can barely manage it. My boss is desperate to keep me, and can tell that I'm about done (I haven't told her I'm looking for other jobs; I'm planning to give notice when I actually have solid prospects). Every time she sees me, she says something like, "I'm trying, please just bear with me!" Or "Don't leave us, we need you!" She even brought me a present on Friday; a big box of nice bath stuff. It's making me feel absolutely terrible. I feel like an awful person because no matter what she does, I don't want this job anymore. I feel like when I do give notice, I might as well be slapping her across the face. I can't stop thinking about how awful and guilty I feel, and I don't know how to manage it.

But this was never meant to be a long-term job. I got my degree in May, it's time to enter the real work force. I signed on for a year at this position, and I've fulfilled that. I'm completely within my rights to leave..

So, how do you put yourself first? How do you leave others in a mess and move on? What do I even say to her?