Yeah--I wonder about this all the time.

I don't think it's a question of whether or not we properly dealt with things (McKell) but rather things happened that overwhelmed us because we were still forming our identity. Young children do not have the defenses or the resources to manage overwhelming feelings, so their mothers are supposed to protect them. (Or it could have been some kind of unavoidable trauma like a death or a plane crash)

Mouse, can you reconstruct the situation with another person in your place? How should that person react? Will they be pissed off? Angry? Completely overwhelmed? The adult in you might be able to shed some light on this for you. Try and take a step back and you might find a degree of reaction you can shoot for in the future.

I know that I threw a few temper tantrums around Christmas that I wlll seek to avoid next year (by running away?) LOL

In the meantime, be gentle with yourself because it's not like we can foresee all of these events and prevent them from happening, is it? So, we react because of the feelings that are still in our bodies.

Go ahead and release your anger--try McKell's elliptical machine! Because those are real, real, real feelings. And they are inside of you.

Peace.