Free - hoping not to re-trigger you...

you wrote "the 10 year old.. tells her pain... brought on by the other alter....of her dads rejection of her... because.. she turned into a woman... she deveopled early... that should be a good thing... but... rejection is tough... when there is no one... but no one that loves you.... so bad love.. is at least love... in her eyes..."

are you saying that when you matured into a woman the dad was no longer interested in that way? that was me... that *form* of his abuse stopped when i became a woman. He hated women and hated me for it. Then he started repressing me; wanted me in long hair, long denim skirts, no make up, no jewelry. whenever i dressed in high heels, make up, necklaces, knee length skirts or higher, he would call me a slut, throw dimes and pennies at me, insinuate that i was worthless. I couldn't even wear a tang top around him, he'd ask if i was practicing for stripping.

(((((((((((free)))))))))) hang in there hon, breathe out the pain tonight and get some sleep, ready to face tomorrow....
(((((((((cami)))))))))))))) so much pain in the world for so many people.
Kiya