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Originally Posted by Pastel Kitten
Thank you so much for your response. What you said does make sense to me.
I definitely have a lot of emotional wounds from my childhood. What goes into inner child healing?
My therapist knows bits and pieces of my childhood but we've never delved too deeply into it because she preferred to focus on DBT skills and fixing the present.
I've never heard of inner bonding. I'll definitely check out that video you linked when I get a chance.
Have you noticed any difference in how you view yourself, even if it's a little?
I wanna know that there's hope..
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It depends on what approach you take to inner child healing. When I was with one of my therapists, one technique she used is visualization. She would guide me through these visualization of certain difficult childhood experiences, help me identify what I needed in those situations, and then instruct me to visualize me getting my needs met in those situations as a child. That's just one tool.
I think DBT is really valuable, and we all (BPD or not) pretty much need to learn or improve upon those skills, but I think what it is missing is healing the wounded parts of ourselves. There are tons of articles you can find on inner child healing, and you may need to try different things.
Yes, I think I have noticed some improvements is how I feel about myself. It does fluctuate though still and I still have a lot of healing to do. For me, I think I need to focus on letting go of needing other people's approval and feeling like I need to fit societal expectations and what is considered "normal" or "successful". I think these things probably play into all of our own self-worth issues, but you may need to focus more on your past and since you said you haven't done it that much in therapy. I think I am able to be somewhat detached at times and observe my negative thoughts and challenge them. I don't always feel strong enough to do it though and sometimes they overtake me. But I think just being aware and noticing them and also noticing how it makes it feel (emotionally and physically) is really important.
Also, something that helps me is listening to a lot of positive, uplifting talks. I don't know if you are into spirituality at all, so it may or may not be for you. I used to go on youtube and listen to people like Wayne Dyer, Marianne Williamson, Eben Alexander, and Anita Moorjani. I still do this, but I'm always looking for new inspiring people to listen to. Anita Moorjani had a powerful NDE (near death experienc)e and wrote a book about it where she reveals that her NDE taught her that she needs to love herself. Check her out, and maybe you'll also find some nuggets of wisdom and inspiration. I think you will
