I struggle with this one.

I fear attachment, but think that is because I experience insecure attachment.

I think the whole attachment thing has been the worse part of therapy for me, as I find it so confusing.

On the one hand, I assume attachment is a normal thing. Without it, no one would grieve when they suffered bereavement in life, no one would commit in a long term relationship. People wouldn't wouldn't feel anything if a partner left them, etc.

But when it comes to therapy, I have no idea what Iam supposed to feel about someone who I spend an intense hour a week with over many years. I'm supposed to contain "my stuff" to that hour per week and not feel anything about the prospect of stopping seeing them. Or maybe I am supposed to feel something, but be able to contain these feelings without feeling overwhelmed.

I think it has something to do with object permanence and maybe feeling secure in oneself and not need someone else to feel that security in life.

But haven't quite got there yet, in sorting it all out for myself. My response is generally avoidance and a "I don't need anyone" position, which I guess I have learned, protects me.

I don't see how I could have explored some of the things I have talked about with T, without feeling a little attached, but can't say it has felt comfortable feeling that way.