sorry hun if it seemed no one cared. substance abuse column doesn't get as much hits as others, but it has it's regulars who do care...sorry it took awhile to respond. I actually understand what your going through and it's a difficult trial with in itself. Life is difficult as it is and drinking (although it helps for a moment) just in ways ends up making it even harder. I drink a lot too, and I have two children and a husband. My husband drinks a lot too. I actually think his drinking and behavior influenced my drinking. I was very young when we got together and in a way I've grown from a child into a woman while married to my husband. Not to displace my blame or nothing, it's just the influence aspect...of course I make my own decisions.

Do you drink daily?

It's fine to seek support outside the home but really the strength to quit completely comes from yourself. I question whether I actually want to quit sometimes. I tell myself a deserve a drink once the kids are in bed and the house sits still. It's amazing what one tells oneself while living in active addiction. But they are excuses.....we all have them.

Don't feel alone out there, we are here and of course willing to be supportive. Look up and don't be so hard on yourself.