I went to therapy today and it helped me feel feelings in my heart, which I've been denying for some time due to my mind not liking it. People I left because they made me feel bad about myself.
And now I am sitting here confused about life, about people. About worrying about physical decay when I start feeling my head on pressure and occasionally see veins slightly popping. I also worry about my knee which has been hurting for some time (check-ups coming soon).
All those symptoms make me feel like I'm dying, especially my deep concerns about AD's I took when I was a teen. I have a whole thread about it.

I don't know what it is that I'm feeling. I think it's frustration. Frustration that I always fail because of me, yet I blame it on others at times because I am SO! sick of bearing responsibility.

I just want the head pressures to stop. I want to feel well on my own