As a former teacher, I zeroed in on your statement that you're not learning. So I ask you this: Would taking an online class help you step away from the thoughts and emotions which plague you at the moment?

I know that there are lots of lectures and lecture series on youtube which you could stream without the added pressure of turning in papers or even doing the registration of a real online class.

If having a bit of responsibility in the form of papers to turn in would help keep you focused on getting through the material, I would be willing to read summaries of whatever you're learning. I would be doing something a little like teaching, which I miss, and it would help you reinforce your new learning.