Hi Marilyn,
I am happy to hear that you are out and about. It is good to get out and intermingle with other people no matter how indifferent they may be, it's good for the brain to process information, pleasant and unpleasant, keep the brain functioning you know what I mean.
Lots of us have trouble out and about especially if we are in a bad patch, it seems there should be some kind of warning sign on our foreheads to fore warn folks, but that would be too much like right, right?
My daughter when she was a mere 15 year old had taken it upon herself to seek counseling when her dad and I were trying to destroy the house brick by brick, well one day after a very heated and intense (throwing stuff at his head) arguement she came to me and said that her counselor said "We get to choose our emotions". She said that we get to decide to how to react to every situation that that was the one thing people could not make us do or take away from us. I am sharing this with you in hopes that the next time you encounter someone that rubs you the wrong way or just gets on your everlasting last nerve....remember, you get to choose. I do this now all the time and it pisses people off. Their intent was to upset me or get a reaction but all they get most of the time is a blank stare.....they are clueless as to what I am thinking and tend to shut up talking to me or just walk away.
Again, it is good news to hear that you are doing your best, cause that is all any of us can do and I am happy for you. You may not see it but you are making progress and soon you will be in a good place of mind, at peace with you.

I too have sleep apnea. I have complex sleep apnea, both obstructive (airway blocking) and central sleep apnea (my brain is not telling my body to breath). I am waiting to see if I will be changed from a cpap to a bipap machine. I really like the bipap machine because it doesn't blow air constantly and only gives the amount of air needed. I am still waiting to discuss the outcome of my last sleep study which detected the central sleep apnea. I actually saw doctor yesterday and thought I would get results then, but after listening to my heart, doing an EKG and asking questions about the dizzy spells Ive been having, she thought it best we go straight to cardio doctor, wear a heart monitor and see what's up with my failing heart. I say failing because I have several issues, like; aortic valve disease, thoracic aneurysm of the aorta arch, hypertrophy of the left ventrical, mild (trivial) regurgitation of mitral and pulmonic valve and some other non important stuff. I'm a little distressed about wearing the monitor. I've worn so many from 3 days to 30 days and all they capture are the pvc's, but they have cordinated symptoms with pvc's so that's a plus, but nothing has been done about it. If my aortic valve or aneurysm gets worse they will intervene with surgery and since I've been operated on from my brain to my groin I can see it happening in my near future.

I fully understand the weight of life sitting on our shoulders and almost forbidding us to move, but it is not so. I share all of this with you to give you hope, to keep fighting as I am, to encourage you and let you know that you are not alone.

I hope you have a wonderful evening, even if it means a great nap and good movies, something good to eat/snack on etc.. Today is the first day of the rest of our lives! Enjoy my friend and be goood to you, so good in fact that others get jealous.

I look forward to your next post and am glad that you know you can come here and vent til you feel better (I vent from time to time also)....know that we are here and we care.

Love and Hugs