i was lookin at my scars from SI/DSH and well all i could think of was how good it was to cut and bleed and just have that scar there as a secret window into my heart and mind and how much pain i was in its been a long long time since i have cut and well if i wasnt sitting typing this id be in the bathroom with my blade cutting bleeding feeling freedom and relief... im really messed up inside my head rite now and i cant seem to get enough medication to feel better i dont want to hurt and i dont want to feel numb by meds anymore theres a screaming inside me that cant get out and its killing me inside