Hi all

I'm just looking for some support and experiences. I'm currently on lamotrigine and Luvox (which is really more for my OCD than my bipolar disorder). Things are generally ok, some really good days even. But I'm still getting these "jags" of depression. I call them that b/c that's what it feels like - things are going well and then just quickly jag sideways. Sorry if that doesn't make sense - I'm in one of them now. I could feel it coming on yesterday and today I've had suicidal thoughts (just thoughts, no impulse/plan/etc.). Worse is the hollow feeling inside... it's like the bottom just falls out. I've also started to derealize at times during these episodes (happened today in the car... that was not fun).

My psychiatrist has been suggesting that we add Latuda. Truth be told I'm scared to death of trying an AP. I'm convinced that I'll get tardive dyskinesia or diabetes and then my life will just be that much worse. At the same time, I feel like I'm not doing well on my current cocktail and I hate these hollow, depressed feelings.

Have you tried an AP? Were you scared of side effects? What made it worth it for you to go on an AP and stay on it? I've got the script filled, the pills are in my medicine bag, and I'm scared to actually swallow one

Help