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Old Jan 04, 2008, 01:37 PM
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sunrise sunrise is offline
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Member Since: Jan 2007
Location: U.S.
Posts: 10,383
Hi JelloFluff, I think it's a good question and one we each have to answer for ourselves. What do we get out of being here? Do we spend too much time?

For me, when I came here in January 2007, I was in the first few months of doing therapy with a new T, and I felt scarily obsessed with him and therapy. I had never felt this way with my previous counselor. I felt like I must be highly aberrant and even deviant to be feeling this way. I was having issues of attachment, trust, obsession, attraction, etc. I thought I was nuts and maybe should stop therapy, that it wasn't healthy. I came here to PC and found that many people have very close relationships with their T's and in fact, such close relationships are therapeutic. And it is the therapeutic relationship itself that is at the heart of therapy. I had never known any of those things. Being here really helped me to learn that, and normalize my experience. My relationship with T soon calmed down and I moved out of the obsession phase into a really comfortable place of healthy attachment. I'm still there. I think PC helped me, at least a little, get there.

As for spending too much time here, I probably do, but I tend to spend a lot of time on the Internet. It is my hobby and I am part of a number of online communities. I have decreased my time spent in some others to accommodate more time spent here. It ebbs and flows. Sometimes if I feel I am posting too much here, I try to limit myself to a certain number of posts a day (say, under 5). And I don't start threads about myself for any little thing, just once in a while. So I try to keep my presence here under control. I do find the people here interesting and less superficial than some online places, so I like it here and have made friends.

Maybe you can just try to limit time as others have suggested?

I would be sad if you left.
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"Therapists are experts at developing therapeutic relationships."