I have, for the last few years, really noticed I have a common theme... I don't want to be with anyone and I don't want them inviting me to things.

There is a few things here,
- I need every single second of my life to get things done that I want to do. This weekend I have a three day weekend and, the thought of spending 4 hours doing someone with someone upsets me. I have a LONG list, that grows every day.. of things to do. And each time someone wants to do things with me... that gets pushed back.

- every single person, every single one... only wants to invite me to do what THEY want. No one wants to help me with any of the chores that I have to do. And so I end up doing things I don't want to do. And my chore list getting longer.

- I don't want to do anything WITH anyone. For some reason everyone who invite me to do things is usually someone I don't trust. They are inviting me to do these things because I am NOT the master at them. Thus they can teach me. Or translated.. make me feel badly about myself and make them feel happy.

- people continue to thoughtlessly invite me to things at the last second. Invite me to lunch when I have already eaten. Invited me out at 12 noon when it is 11 Am. I have plans people! But when I tell them that they act like I have some "hermit problem" and I feel forced to go.

The thing is though.. pretty much 95% of the invites I don't want to go to... I want to do what *I* want to do. And I am getting tired of fulfilling everyone else needs --- and I am also FRUSTRATED that I they see to have so much time on their hands.

So I wonder if it is me? Today I was invited to do something with a family member that i feel usually upset doesn't want to do more things with me. But I don't want to go.. at all. For all of the above reasons but also it is just not my thing. I worry there iS something wrong but when I think about it I also think I am right... it is just that people expect a single person to do things with them.