Key tones- interesting theory about this being part of perfectionism. I do have some issues w that so it could be. Idk. It's like I procrastinate and put stuff off to avoid what feel like impossible and insurmountable tasks- and they then pile up and I begin to feel paralyzed by the sheer amount of work I now have, which leads to self loathing. Bleh.

Trying- i can't imagine having kids and having to keep up with the daily routine of getting them ready for school and feeding them for 3 meals a day and stuff. Some days taking care of my cats seems exhausting. So don't knock yourself for not being able to always keep up. I wish I had someone here who could pick up the slack when I stop doing stuff; instead it just piles up until my home starts to resemble a hoarders episode. Sigh.

Anyway, feeling a little better. Gonna try to break down the chores And prioritize. Trying to remind myself that Just bc I need to do laundry to have.clean underwear doesn't mean I have to do all 6 loads today. I Get sucked into black or white thinking. I Slept like crap but did eventually sleep last nite and I suppose now that I am awake I will try to summon some motivation from the universe to help me clean up my disaster.
Sorry for the rant. Just feeling overwhelmed and like there must be something intrinsically wrong w me that I can't seem to master being human after 40 years of trying.
Anyway, have a nice Sunday everybody. Take care.