They dont have those things here unfortunately. I would love that option because it sounds like a good compromise. I used to abuse meds now I just dont take as prescribed which I'm not really surprised about. I made it a week at home almost but I just felt so off like instead of finding middle ground I went way off sideways. They brought me down somewhat and I wasnt depressed but I'm just not right. I dont even know who I am or who I want to be. I feel great right now though but my husband doesnt seem to and you all seem to think this is bad. If I let myself look at it as an outsider I can see its bad, people are unhappy and I'm not good at doing the family stuff or medication stuff. But if I look at it as the person I am right now I feel more connected to myself and like I'm giving myself the freedom to figure out who I really am, the risperidone wasnt right and I know it. My T said(earlier this year) it sounds like I think it has to be either I'm happy or my family is happy but can't be both. She told me that's not true but the longer this goes on the more I think it is true.