(((((((((jinny)))))))))) I'm sorry you're hurting so much right now. It is hard to beat of isolation when we don't want to be around anyone, but don't want to be alone either. I read a lot just for that reason. I am glad you are reaching out here. Keep reaching out. It is hard to remember, but the flashbacks are already over - they happened and now, even tho they feel like they'll kill you, can't really hurt you any more. It might be helpful to think of them like a tv - a picture far away from you in a box that you have control over with a remote - you can turn off the volume, change the channel, turn off the tv - or you can choose to look at the flachback as if it were a horror story of someone elses life. Then you can know the information without it consuming you.

((((((((safe hugs if you want them))))))
Kiya