Just recently I came to the realization that I don't specifically remember being 9 years old. I can come up with some type of memory (neutral at best, traumatizing at worst) of being 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 and 8, then 10 and on, although some of them are just memories from school. My memories at home I sometimes get confused about my age. But I truly cannot remember school in 5th grade and no memories from home. I have a very traumatic memory from being 8 years old (it's like my mind is blank after that incident), then a few memories of being 10, a couple from school and two very traumatic memories from home.

These three memories, along with several others from age 11 up through 16, run through my mind daily. I just want them to go away, but they won't.