Hurt is a topic that can come up a lot in therapy and was the topic of a recent poll here.

But it's a question that has often puzzled me because for a long time I had my "hurt feelings" disconnected/dissociated and didn't consciously feel them, although I seem to have had various ways of dealing with whatever it is that would have led me to feeling "hurt", if I could have felt it back then.

More basic questions may be "What is pain? Why do we have it?" There may be some people who don't feel physical pain. And if they don't then it would be hard to explain to them what pain "is", I think. Certainly pain can be a "pain" to deal with sometimes. But without it we would probably be more likely to re-damage damaged parts of ourselves. Pain helps, or makes, us pay attention.

So, what about "hurt feelings"? What is it that has been hurt?

Seems to me like it's our sense of self, or ego. So then, why do we have an ego? There's lot of folks saying in effect that ego is a problem. And various psychological and spiritual techniques to help people "let it go".

But that brings me back to the original questions. If "ego" is a hindrance rather than a help to our lives, why do we have it? And if impacts of the world and other people result in "hurt feeling", what are those feelings helping or causing us to protect?