I have a person I consider a soul mate yet we are very different.

It seems tough now but once you are out of high school doors are going to start opening for you. It will be easier to be drawn to groups of like-minded people. You are better in control of the directions you will take and the people you will meet.

In the meantime find some help. I take it you are still in school. At 17 (did i understand this right?) you have a lot of options you may not even realise. For one, you don't need permission to schedule medical appointments, etc. A good start is your family doctor. He/she should be a good judge of whether you should be referred to a psychiatrist. Meanwhile you likely have school guidance counsellor. Start a dialogue with them. School Boards these days have psychologists on retainer. Your guidance counsellor should be able to set you up with one.

Remember that you actually aren't alone. As I mentioned above, there are people to talk to.