When I talk about my allergies, I suppose it sounds so trivial.

I hate being so useless, Papa Bear has to do the cooking because I’m allergic to the air flow. Of the cooker.

Or is it just that I’m “making excuses” / no it isn’t. I hate hate hate being so useless. It honestly makes me not want to be here.

All the voices of the abusers in my head already tell me how useless and selfish I am.,

And now I am useless

The medics talk about “controlling” the eczema. I had it before when the parental units treated me like an evil person and an emotional drain and a burden. And told me all those things I had to live many miles away. If I had been even more “useless” I would have been on the streets. These allergies
bring back PTSD memories.

I tried to talk to a therapist about some of this. He was interested in pretty young females, I was quite pretty. But he found me talking about eczema distasteful. I suppose it was and is.

I feel like deleting this. I think it’s in the wrong forum (except that I don’t cope with it, I hate it and wish it would leave me alone