Quote:
Originally Posted by amandalouise
um sorry I also disagree here.....
the idea of freedom of speech is something that comes up frequently... here is the guideline on that....
Hey, I thought this was a democracy! Why was my free speech impinged?
Well, the U.S. Constitution's First Amendment applies to the government -- not private businesses or other organizations. So yeah, we're sorry, but this isn't a democracy and you don't have absolute free speech in our community. As long as your post, PM or chat doesn't violate our community guidelines, it is generally allowed.
(found in FAQ pages)
also members are not being kept from telling their friends goodbye. they just have to pm their friends that they are leaving and why. they can still discuss with their friends by pm their goodbyes. just not where its going to upset the whole community. I have in the past used pm to let members know I was taking an extended leave from the site for what ever reasons. pming works very well. no one on the boards got personally offended or scared I was suicidal and there was no infighting on the boards as my friends and I discussed my leaving for a bit during those times when I did take leave of the site. I think of pming like before there were cell phones. some people had private telephone numbers and private phone line where they could be sure that no one else would over hear their discussions. like a journal where no one else except those designated will get to see their most private thoughts, pming is actually a wonderful tool for saying hello, how you doing, good bye and much much more.. the way I see it its just as easy to make a goodbye pm to friends as it is to make a goodbye thread. pm even allows me to send the same post to more than one friend at the same time.
in other words members are not being prevented from saying goodbye. they just have to do so in the way the site allows by private message to those they want to know.
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I can see also where people need it to be done quickly possibly for legal reasons if they are involved in a divorce or custody situation, but even in that instance, PMing an administrator is still going to be faster than posting a thread.
I do find the deletion threads upsetting and disturbing. Some people leave because they decide they don't like the community, and that's upsetting to me because, even though I fail sometimes, I know I try to give constructive feedback and make supportive comments. I know we are all striving to create a safe, supportive place here. So in a way, it feels a little like a slap in the face.
In other instances, when someone whose given you advice or that you relied on suddenly posts that they're deleting their account, it does give you cause for worry and also creates doubts about your own stability in your head.
I just personally feel that the deletion threads serve much like the goodbye threads and create more harm than good. I think, as AmandaLouise put it, they can PM people that they are leaving and their reasons why instead of causing distress to the whole community.