I am sorry your family has broken up. Sometimes things that happened a while back can cause problems when we don't talk about our feelings fully at the time they occurred. And sometimes we bring up things from way to long ago and hold it against our partner when we are angry at them.

I do not know her so I don't know if it is to late but when you are feeling angry toward her just leave. This is not a good time to talk to her. The more mean, angry, threatening or negative things you say, the farther you will drive her away. Instead of hassling her, find things that you genuinely like and complement her. Is she willing to go on a date with you anymore? If it is not too late and she is will to be with you sometimes a tender touch, rather than words might win her over. Especially if your physical relationship was good and she is not seeing someone else. She might miss having sex with you. While this could help, don't rush into it to fast unless you know it is what she wants. Hopefully you are able to tell when she is having good feelings toward you--make sure she is happy to be hugged and held first. Be patient rather than controlling and make sure you are doing more listening than badgering--have you ever talked to a therapist about this? I hope it all works out for you. I am sorry you are hurting so much.