I've spent the afternoon writing to people begging for work... mainly because I know M will ask tomorrow morning if I managed to do it, and I'm sure not going to feel like it when I get back from my evening teaching.

I think the worst of the depression has lifted but I still feel like I'm toeing the edge of complete and utter worthlessness. Which makes my dependence on these random favors from barely-known colleagues based on other peoples' schedules and networks even more horrible.

And then there are the ones who think if they book me for concert, then it results in a date. It scares me every time.