I'll be laughing and joking about horrible things (no one else is laughing but I don't care). I only share my warped sense of humor with my husband, T, and Pdoc. Then switch to horrible angry ***** mode. Then to my husband's plotting against me or I'd be better without him. The whole time I'm uncomfortable because I have to much energy. Then I think of horrible ways to get rid of the energy not realizing if I acted on it I'd die. I just think hurting myself would be fun. My thoughts are all jumbled and my concentration is shot. On the outside I'm just shaking my leg and having a bad day. I'm more paranoid, time goes too slow for me. So it's not fun.

As for my period. I sleep the day away the day before my period and I get suicidal right before.