I'm sorry I don't have any good suggestions for you. But I can relate to a lot of what you wrote. I'm not on any med's. They've never really been of much help. Some have done more harm than good. Plus, I have things I have to do. I can't afford to be muddled by medication. I wake up every morning feeling like I've been hit by a bus. It gets a bit better throughout the day. But not a lot.

I have a pdoc I see a couple of times a year, just to keep my foot in the door so to speak. I've seen a few different therapists for brief periods over the years. They ranged from mediocre to dreadful! I don't believe there is any help for me out there. Oh of course there are plenty of people who are more than willing to take my money. But that's all it ever amounts to. So I just keep to myself. I consider it to be my gift to the world.

I hope you are able to find some way to ameliorate your depression. Struggling with your own depression & then caring for your S.O with dementia as well has to be excruciatingly difficult. I presume you've checked out the possibilities as far as in-home care & seniors services goes. Best wishes for success with your upcoming PCP appointment.