Sometimes you can't wait for the motivation to come to you because it may never arrive - sometimes you need to give yourself a push and do those healthy things (exercise, eating healthy food and portions, etc) even if it feels like the last thing you want to do. Eventually it will become a habit if you stick to it. I've never needed to lose weight but I do exercise for the mental health benefits. Physical changes in appearance like increased muscle are just bonuses for me.

I have access to hundreds of free workout routines that you can do in the comfort of your own home, which puts the kibosh on the whole "I couldn't make it to the gym today" excuse. If you are ever interested in that, please feel free to let me know. I'd be happy to hook you up with some beginner friendly routines.

It appears from the outside as if you have gotten yourself into a helpless way of thinking, and are hoping that a weight loss drug or another person will save you. Yes, support groups and weight loss medication can help, but ultimately you need to do the work. If this is truly important to you, you will make the time. If not, staying stuck is the other option. I hope you choose what is healthier for you.