hi rhapsody and i'm so sorry for your loss. we never get over it, do we? just learn to live with it. i had a mental breakdown after 2 important losses and it was agony. didn't think i'd make it through. i'm glad you are here and talking about it. i'm not sure what other thread you discussed this on. can you tell us more about her?

i just realized i responded after only reading 2 pages and you had just posted another important one today. wow, what agony you went through. sounds like you did the best thing you could for both you AND her. what a mark of courage to put her in a situation that would be better for you both. You were dealing with so much. The fact that they all looked at you like that without having an open enough mind to give you the benefit of the doubt must have been like torture on top of torture. it all sounds so difficult. are you blaming yourself less now? i sure hope so! you really did the very best you could. you were holding on to your own sanity by a thread...how could you have done more?? and yet i understand why you blamed yourself because of not being together and strong enough to deal. it's what we do to ourselves, unfortunately. it's so sad though. i'm so sorry you had to live through something like this.