I told the psych nurse that gave me the needle about my suicidal and homicidal thoughts that I can't control sometimes. I feel like I'm judged a lot because she said I talked about killing my family but I'm not a monster. She asked why I didn't tell my actual psychologist/psych nurse and I said that I was afraid that he would send me back the hospital and when I get out, I wouldn't be allowed to stay in the same house as my family

I thought an outside force or God was telling me to kill my cat and my mom or my sister by controlling my thoughts and movements. It said to take my meds which I believed would stop my heart or I'd have to kill so I took half of my meds then walked up stairs took the knife from the kitchen, put it up to my neck, put it knife down then went to wake up my mom and told her I was in psychosis and need the injection

I asked my dad on text that I took the med because I thought I was him in his past life and he did it so he asked me how much I took and I said 5mg but how would he know about medications? That fuelled the whole thing.