Yes, never feel guilty for protecting yourself. As stated above, the police decided he was a danger and protected you from him. It almost sounds like you have PTSD from the experience, though I cannot diagnose. Continue to work with your therapist. I know from your previous post that you love him deeply, but that he was violent towards you. Please rethink being with this man permanently. Physical violence only just escalates over time. (((hugs)))) He may sound remorseful now, but that is typically what follows abuse and after he receives the repercussions of abuse.