One thing at a time, Rose. No need to decide everything all at once. That will only overwhelm you.

If you can possibly scrape together the money for private, why not do that? I know it's expensive. But you seem really low. This tiredness, and the way you describe your sleep, is very concerning. It sounds almost like despair. People would spend that on a holiday, wouldn't they? I can't imagine what money is for if not to help someone who is so in need.

I know you keep hoping this will pass, but it sounds like its getting worse.

Forgive the bossiness.

You deserve care.