I have no wisdom to share, but I do have a slightly silly anecdote:

When I saw my therapist a few days ago she had a cough--nothing too terrible, but at one point she started rummaging around in her desk drawers and said something like, "don't mind me, I'm looking for a cough drop so I don't start coughing--once I start coughing I can't stop. Just ignore me." But there was no cough drop to be found, and she managed to carry on.

When I went to see her today I put a few cough drops in my pocket. (Like many of y'all, one of the ways I show affection is to take care of people. I suppose there are healthy and unhealthy aspects of that tendency, but I come from a long line of Carers and it's pretty well ingrained at this point.) She was still coughing, and after letting her struggle with it for a bit, I fished one out of my pocket and offered it to her. She looked surprised and a little bewildered but took it and stuck it in her mouth. Before she could say anything I said, "yes yes, I know--you don't need me to take care of you; you're perfectly capable of taking care of yourself." She smiled. "Did you bring this with me in mind?" "Yes." She shook her head ruefully. "Well, I suppose the fact that I haven't managed to come up with any cough drops in the last three days contradicts what you've said." We laughed, and got back to what we'd been talking about.

So... maybe it's okay to take care of your therapist just a little, as long as you address the subtext dead-on??