I don't know exactly why she doesn't let clients book multiple sessions in advance. Maybe it's to be fair to everyone irregardless of need. Not that I really "need" her as my symptoms are very well managed.

Or maybe it's hospital policy because I tried once with the appointment hotline and they didn't allow it.

Whenever this happens, it triggers old stuff. Of always being last, less than an afterthought. Always expected to be The OK One, the one whose struggles don't matter because they're not that bad compared to others. Where coping isn't affirmed and just expected because who cares about the cost to me?