Hey, I agree with your therapist, too. But I also do understand that acceptance can be the hardest thing in the world. Part of it can be in figuring out what acceptance requires - and in figuring out what one gets out of it.

It is fairly common for people to distinguish between primary and secondary emotions. Primary emotions are emotions that seem to arise up by themselves - not in response to any prior thought. Secondary emotions are emotions that arise in response to our judgement or thoughts about the primary emotion.

For example... One might find oneself feeling angry. And then feel ashamed in response to the anger. In this instance anger is primary and shame is secondary.

One might feel anxious. And then feel really very anxious in response to the primary anxiety.

The thought is that primary emotions tend to be short lived. They pass. It is in their nature. Secondary emotions tend to be sustained by our repeated thoughts or judgements or cognitions, however. Secondary emotions are meant to be the most distressing emotions. Because they last longer.

So say you feel anxious... Then feel really very anxious in response to thinking of that primary anxiety as 'terrible' or 'terrifying' or 'something that I shouldn't be feeling'. The notion is that those thoughts are what serves to keep the anxiety really very intense and refiring over and over and over.

What to do to break out of the circuit?

Accept the primary emotion. Sometimes people do feel anxious. It is normal to feel anxious. It is understandable to feel anxious sometimes. If you attend to that anxiety in a way that neither pushes it away nor clings to it you will notice it coming and going ebbing and flowing like waves upon the shore.

If you fight it you get into a tug of war with your body. If you invalidate your primary emotion then you get a more intense secondary emotion. If you can acknowledge and accept the primary emotion then you might find that you are able to direct your attention onto something more pleasant.

Of course this is a hell of a lot harder to do than it sounds...