Hugs. I doubt you're making things up. Really. *hugs* I used to and still sometimes think I made things up even though I've corroboration from siblings and my partner.

Because what little I remember feels so unreal and has no emotion and is hazy or incoherent or whatever...And there's stuff they say happened which I've no memory of.

And yea, a particular friend who is very dissociative tell me they wonder if they made things up or if it was a bad nightmare...depending on their internal feelings... Even with court records as it was that bad...

My T always says what matters is the emotions even if there's no memory (visual or otherwise) attached to it.