In case you haven't read about it elsewhere on this site, my husband was arrested back in July for setting our house on fire and he is either going to attempt to make a plea deal or go to trial within the next few weeks. I want to make a victim's impact statement when he gets sentenced because what he did has really affected me and I want the court to understand that what he did was related to his abusive behavior. Even though it's not required, I'd like to read my statement myself because this is the only chance I will get to speak openly about what he did and I want him to hear me. Writing this thing is really stressful and I imagine reading it in court will be a highly emotionally draining event.

My therapist and I are talking about why I want to do this and what I want to say and he's told me that he supports me in this. I'd really like to ask him if he could go with me to court when I read it. I have no idea if it's ethical for him to do that. When I had to testify in front of a grand jury, he said to me that he would go with me if he wasn't going to be out of town, but I wonder if he would have actually gone or it was just something he said but didn't mean or hadn't really thought through. When we talked about getting a restraining order, he told me he would write me a letter of support, but then later told me he couldn't do that after talking to other therapists about it. So I guess I suspect he'll say no. But I need some support to do this. My support system is really limited. Right now, it's my therapist and the four other women that I go to a domestic violence support group with. I don't know when the sentencing will happen but it will be during court hours which are also work hours so it's doubtful the women would be able to go.

Should I ask him if he could go with me? Should I ask in person or send an email so I don't put him on the spot? Should I offer to pay him for his time? How do I prepare myself for being hurt by him saying no?