I'm having a tough time dealing with someones behaviour which has been a major trigger for nearly a year now. Hoping for some rationalising here as my next therapeutic session is far away. It's kind of like remembering a school bully except he didn't bully me, he bullied other people. I've never met him, I've never addressed him, we live in separate countries. There is nothing there between us. A long time ago, I was made aware of controversy surrounding him and I looked really deep into it and came across some awful stuff; death threats, violence, racism, misogyny and a blatant disregard of basic human kindness.

I don't know how to deal with this unwanted knowledge of how awful someone can be. What's even more ridiculous is that there are even worse people out there. A LOT worse. But the things they'd say to people were so evil it's not easy to erase that from my memory.

It was really evil:

In one video, he hopes a pregnant woman he'd argued with would have a miscarriage. WHO says this?? I know a lot of awful people but I could never EVER wish this on someone having seen first hand the devastation a miscarriage can cause. This is evil. Or could I perhaps be exaggerating??

I know there are murderers out there and animal abusers but openly and publicly wishing for a woman to miscarry is equivalent to violence. It's just so, so, so wrong.