Hey fluffy, Sorry to hear your in such a messed up situation.
I am experienced in living in a D/s relationship, my current partner is my also my Dom.
And I can tell you now, nothing about your relationship constitutes a real BDSM relationship.
Your Dom is responsible for both your physical and emotional wellbeing, no aftercare even on line is a huge red flag.
These types of relationships are built on communication.
His job is to make you so safe and secure that you are able to live out YOUR fantasy.
Recorded consent means nothing, you are still entitled to stop at ANYTIME.
From what I see here your needs are not being met.
Is humiliation and verbal abuse something that you have consented too?
Does it turn you on.
You need a very clear list of your ons, your soft offs and hard offs.
You need a safe word. No exceptions.
Most of all you need to re address this relationship.
His behaviour is not that of a Dom, but a bully.
He doesn't know what he is doing, and this makes him dangerous.
My Dom is never afraid to show he cares at ANYTIME but especially after a scene, he cares for me, holds me tells me he loves and adores me. Praises me and builds me up.
I can stop whenever I like.
I can say I am not in the mood, without fear of reprimand or punishment.
Please consider your situation carefully and if you have any questions feel free to PM me.
Take care. Stay safe.